This doesn't make him feel bad. It makes him feel good, and he can't push that feeling away anymore. Simon is shaking because of him. Because of his scent. ]
Still a good step in the right direction. I hope you're not shaking too terribly.
[Tell him more? Well— here he is worried he'll make Harrow feel bad about this, but he hopes he's said enough for him to understand he doesn't blame him for any of this. It's this place. It's Harrow's scent, not Harrow himself. So with a little trepidation he'll turn the camera on on his phone, holds his hand up.
He doesn't press record right away, watching his own hand as it shakes, fingers twitching on their own. The phone is unsteady in his other hand, no doubt Harrow will notice it. He'll hit record then, everything is shaking, but he tries to still the hand holding his phone as best he can.]
So far only shaking. Not yet crying and throwing up.
[Thankfully it hasn't caused that reaction in him yet. Though his nightmares... that is a little different.
Might need a break. Bag this back up.
[The camera turns now to his face, offering a little smile even as he breathes out... you guessed it, shakily.]
Gonna need a shower, I'm gonna stink like you now.
[There's amusement in that, even as he knows it would continue to make his nerves go haywire. The video is sent and he'll push up to grab the bag the shirt had come in, pushes it back in there. Whoo, that's enough for today. Where is he going to put this...? Even in the bag he can smell it. Hrm... Simon wanders into the bathroom, opens up the little cabinet under the sink and shoves the bag in there. Better for now. He leans down to sniff at his own shirt now. Oh yeah. That sure stinks like Harrow.]
[ Harrow isn't expecting to get a video. It starts, and he's treated to Simon's trembling hand, then to his face as he releases a delightfully shaky breath, releasing one of his own as he swallows the last ounce of guilt he was trying to hold onto. He had started stroking himself already, but seeing this, he goes a little faster.
He doesn't like that Simon mentions washing Harrow's scent off himself. It feels wrong and aggravating, like he wants Simon to smell like him, he wants other beasts to smell him on Simon so they know to stay away.
Nothing he can do about it now, though, so he just replays the video back a couple more times, pressure building and building as he thinks about the chase, how Simon smelled on the other side of the door, how much his scent assaults his nostrils from the shirt hanging off his shoulder.
He finishes with a deep rumble in his throat, sighing out Simon's name, hungrily, desperately.
It doesn't take very long before he comes back to his senses, mostly, and feels like absolute shit. What did he just do? Why did he do that? What's wrong with him?
Taking the shirt off his shoulders and tossing it to the side, as if being only a few feet away will make any difference, he gets up and heads off to the bathroom to clean himself up, splash cold water on his face. It's a bit before he replies again, after a deep breath, trying to go back to a lighter tone, something more normal than whatever the fuck that was. ]
You don't have to say it like that. You'll hurt my feelings.
[... there's a significant lull in reply from Harrow and he wonders if he's actually done the wrong thing with that video.
Shit.
Should he send a text? Apologize? Maybe he should just... clean up. Yeah. So he does, strips out of his clothes that now too stink of Harrow and washes himself. It's a quick shower, but he makes sure to really work in the fragrant wash he'd bought, uses it also on his shirt and pants and hangs them to dry after. Drying off he'll hear the notification go off from his phone.
Oh good, okay.]
think I can still smell you I scrubbed really hard too
[He sniffs for good measure, no, no just the nice soap smell. Though as he wanders back into the living room area there is sure a lingering haze of Harrow that is coming from the couch where'd he'd sat. Hm. Gonna need to invest in some kind of order blocker/remover. Or... maybe that little bit won't be so bad? The slight goosebumps on his arms and legs says otherwise.]
[ That has to be uncomfortable for Simon, still smelling Harrow no matter how hard he scrubs. And yet, he's exhilarated by the thought of his scent lingering in Simon's room, always there with him, keeping him on edge. ]
[ Definitely dead, but for just a little bit he pretended he wasn't. Thinking on it now, though...Simon wrote an entry every day for four years, and always mentioned him. Naturally, he noticed that before, but...it hits different right now. ]
[It's hard for him too. He wants to be by his side. He'd already felt fragile enough first arriving here, now this... soon though, he wouldn't let this continue.]
it's pretty late think I'll turn in your stink wore me out
send me more stuff for work tomorrow yeah? keep me busy when I'm not sewing holes in my shirts
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 07:25 am (UTC)This doesn't make him feel bad. It makes him feel good, and he can't push that feeling away anymore. Simon is shaking because of him. Because of his scent. ]
Still a good step in the right direction. I hope you're not shaking too terribly.
[ Do tell him more, Simon. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 07:49 am (UTC)He doesn't press record right away, watching his own hand as it shakes, fingers twitching on their own. The phone is unsteady in his other hand, no doubt Harrow will notice it. He'll hit record then, everything is shaking, but he tries to still the hand holding his phone as best he can.]
So far only shaking. Not yet crying and throwing up.
[Thankfully it hasn't caused that reaction in him yet. Though his nightmares... that is a little different.
Might need a break. Bag this back up.
[The camera turns now to his face, offering a little smile even as he breathes out... you guessed it, shakily.]
Gonna need a shower, I'm gonna stink like you now.
[There's amusement in that, even as he knows it would continue to make his nerves go haywire. The video is sent and he'll push up to grab the bag the shirt had come in, pushes it back in there. Whoo, that's enough for today. Where is he going to put this...? Even in the bag he can smell it. Hrm... Simon wanders into the bathroom, opens up the little cabinet under the sink and shoves the bag in there. Better for now. He leans down to sniff at his own shirt now. Oh yeah. That sure stinks like Harrow.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 09:27 am (UTC)He doesn't like that Simon mentions washing Harrow's scent off himself. It feels wrong and aggravating, like he wants Simon to smell like him, he wants other beasts to smell him on Simon so they know to stay away.
Nothing he can do about it now, though, so he just replays the video back a couple more times, pressure building and building as he thinks about the chase, how Simon smelled on the other side of the door, how much his scent assaults his nostrils from the shirt hanging off his shoulder.
He finishes with a deep rumble in his throat, sighing out Simon's name, hungrily, desperately.
It doesn't take very long before he comes back to his senses, mostly, and feels like absolute shit. What did he just do? Why did he do that? What's wrong with him?
Taking the shirt off his shoulders and tossing it to the side, as if being only a few feet away will make any difference, he gets up and heads off to the bathroom to clean himself up, splash cold water on his face. It's a bit before he replies again, after a deep breath, trying to go back to a lighter tone, something more normal than whatever the fuck that was. ]
You don't have to say it like that. You'll hurt my feelings.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 09:55 am (UTC)Shit.
Should he send a text? Apologize? Maybe he should just... clean up. Yeah. So he does, strips out of his clothes that now too stink of Harrow and washes himself. It's a quick shower, but he makes sure to really work in the fragrant wash he'd bought, uses it also on his shirt and pants and hangs them to dry after. Drying off he'll hear the notification go off from his phone.
Oh good, okay.]
think I can still smell you
I scrubbed really hard too
[He sniffs for good measure, no, no just the nice soap smell. Though as he wanders back into the living room area there is sure a lingering haze of Harrow that is coming from the couch where'd he'd sat. Hm. Gonna need to invest in some kind of order blocker/remover. Or... maybe that little bit won't be so bad? The slight goosebumps on his arms and legs says otherwise.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 10:46 am (UTC)I do like to leave a strong impression.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 11:09 am (UTC)tell me about it
learned that day one with you!
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 11:34 am (UTC)"What a jerk. But brilliant."
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 11:39 am (UTC)[God. The fact Harrow remembers it, that he read it... a reminder that he's truly dead back home. No other way he'd ever get his hands on it.]
hiding the new journal better
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:02 pm (UTC)[ Definitely dead, but for just a little bit he pretended he wasn't. Thinking on it now, though...Simon wrote an entry every day for four years, and always mentioned him. Naturally, he noticed that before, but...it hits different right now. ]
What, you think I'm going to sneak a peek?
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:06 pm (UTC)[At first it was because Harrow was his work, but then slowly he became his life. Maybe he hadn't seen it himself...]
you so would
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 12:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 01:07 pm (UTC)[ Haha get it? ]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 01:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 01:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 01:52 pm (UTC)I'll do that soon enough
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 02:03 pm (UTC)[ No seriously this is a lot more difficult than he thought it would be. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 02:30 pm (UTC)it's pretty late
think I'll turn in your stink wore me out
send me more stuff for work tomorrow yeah?
keep me busy when I'm not sewing holes in my shirts
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 02:42 pm (UTC)Good idea. Talking to you is exhausting.
[ Get it because Harrow is actually the exhausting one haha. ]
Don't worry. I have plenty to keep you busy.
Good night, Simon.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-09 02:44 pm (UTC)g'night harrow